A Kerry Fancier's Guide To Shakespeare

Author unknown. Submited by Carol Blundell

"To be or not to be, that is the question."
(Shall we breed this season?)
"Double, double, toil and trouble,
Fire burn and cauldron bubble"
(Ringside gossip)
"Methought I heard a voice cry, "Sleep no more ..."
(Bitch in season in same house with active stud)
"What fools these mortals be"
(They just bought their third dog)
"Out, out damned spot!"
(They are housebreaking the third dog)
"What light through yonder window breaks?"
(Up all night whelping)
"Much ado about nothing"
(False pregnancy)
"Assume a virtue if you have it not"
(Be a good loser)
"Play such fantastic tricks before high heaven
as make the angels weep"
(On seeing some odd judging - or clever handling)
"Small curs are not regarded when they grin"
(Unless they have a big-name handler)
"Nor let the rain of heaven wet this place"
(The prayer of all outdoor show chairs)
"He hath but a little wee face,
with a little yellow beard"
(Cairn Terrier)
"Like a fountain with an hundred spouts"
(Male dog going for walk)
"A double blessing is a double grace"
(Best of Breed AND a group placement)
"I love the sport well; but I shall as soon quarrel
at it as any man in England"
(Sentiments of the inveterate dog-show enthusiast)
"Young gentlemen, your spirits are too bold for your years"
(class of terrier puppies)
"Your father is at Westminster"
(But your mother wasn't show-quality)
"And I do wish your honours may increase"
(Best-in-show next time!)
"Obedience; for so work the honey-bees,
Creatures that by a rule in nature teach
the act of order"
(A good definition!)